A few years ago, I worked for a boss who talked constantly about her desire to lose weight.
Every morning, I’d check into her office and she’d tell me how she was sick and tired of gaining weight.
Because I was going through my health nut phase at the time, I really felt for her. I had only recently changed my diet myself, so I figured she simply didn’t know where to start. In an effort to help, I began routinely suggesting different food documentaries she could watch, different exercises she could do, and recipes she could make. I even brought her a book all about clean eating.
Unfortunately, my help went unheeded. My boss never made any changes; she never implemented any of my suggestions and I’m pretty sure she never even read the book I gave her. Yet she continued to complain about her weight! I remember feeling so frustrated that in one breath, she would talk about losing weight yet in the next breath, she would ask everyone in the office if we wanted pizza or fried food for lunch!
Needless to say, I stopped offering help when she would talk about her weight issues; I would just smile politely and listen. It was apparent that she didn’t really want to lose weight because she wasn’t willing to do what it took to have what she said she wanted.
Unfortunately, this I-say-I-want-it-but-not-really conundrum is a trap that many of us fall into. We give lip service to getting out of debt, starting a business, improving our grades, taking better care of our hair, or whatever. To truly want something is to want all that that “something” entails.
This weekend during one of my YouTube video watching marathons (don’t judge, I was deep conditioning my hair!) I came across this video from Youtuber Sunshine Abuwi:
(Start at 1:09)
To give a little back drop, Sunshine (yes that’s her real name!) recently re-launched her hair and skin care product line. From the looks of things, it seems like her business is taking off! (Go Sunshine!) In this video, Sunshine talks about how she has to remind herself that if she wants the glamour of running a successful business, then she also has to want the not-so-glamourous things that come with it sometimes, like standing in long lines at the post office or having to come home and take care of her son even though she’s tired.
A lot of times we think we want something but we don’t really want it. We may want the results of it or the feeling of accomplishment we would have when we got that, but we don’t really want it because we don’t want to do the work required. And, I have to push through that everyday. I have to say to myself, ‘Sunshine, if this is what you want, this is what is required. — Sunshine
I can 100% relate to what Sunshine is talking about in this video. Sometimes, I have to even ask myself “How bad do I really want this?” with “this” equating to a number of things:
I genuinely want all of the above. But I know I can’t just want the results of having or being any of those things, I have to want what is required.
What is it you say you want? Be honest, do you really want it? Are you willing to do what is required? Share in the comments.
(unedited photo via)